It’s not even funny how insecure some people can be from the inside,when outwardly they show this confident,assured air. I am appalled.
Although I sometimes strongly disagree with decisions my dad has made,I still love him so much that it breaks my heart several million times when I see him weak or troubled.His whole life has been a long struggle, and I hope with all my earnest that his life is an epitome of all the success and happiness in the world.
I love you more than you will ever know,dad.More than I will ever be able to express.I love you.
So many of us are blessed with close and loving relationships in our lives.We share our ups and downs with these people.We fight,we make up.We go away and miss each other.We come back and party.All of it is so beautiful.But somewhere along the lines, we take a lot of things about these relationships for granted.
The culture I live in, hugs are part of formal meeting gestures.I hardly ever saw family members hugging each other because they wanted to show their affection or support.Or maybe, I don’t get out much.But anyway, hugs are very very important.They are God’s way of showing security and protection to His creatures,through His creatures!
Sometimes when things are’nt right and your closed ones are in need of support, you go to them and shower them with all your philosophical shit about life being a winding road and how things will be fine when you see the next corner .But all they need right then is one fine,big hug.Problem solved.But no, we never think about it.We ask them to speak their hearts out, shed however much tears they want to shed, have bucketloads of icecream,watch some chick-flick..anything.Just anything to make them feel better.But we forget that a simple cuddle will calm them down.
What a shame.I just realized I never hugged my siblings that way and it hurts me too bloody much.Why have I not shown them how much I love them.This is it. I am gonna make sure I give them bear sized hugs next time I meet them.Resolution#567
All of us have a atory to tell.Everyday holds a new page to the diary of our lives.It is commendable how gracefully we carry our heavy hearts and get on with lives.God knew when he made the heart,how strong a piece of machinery he was fixing into the human body.It is amazing how much the heart can bear and still keep functioning.Although I do believe, every loss we face in our lives leaves a hole in our heart,which no physical thing,person or achievement can fill.
I am into a new phase of my life, but the phase I left behind is not something I can let go because it still holds the people I love.
I have just gotten off a call to my mother and I hung up very upset and agitated.I had decided that I would not let things worry me like they used to, and I will not shed tears in hopelessness because there is always hope.That said, I have never had a relationship with my parents where I can console them for any loss, calm them with kind words or the like.I always end up being dead quiet, thinking that my words will never be good enough.That I am still that little child for them who they don’t expect will understand the severity of things.
I have always seen them worrying for others more than they ever worried for themselves.I thought that’s what made life worthwhile.But what is this? They have ended up alone,disolated and helpless.I probably should’nt say that.We all have God to help us, so there is no question of helplessness,but they should be in a better position than they are in,right now.
I don’t know what to say or do.There is this constant, burning pain in my heart that never goes away.I should have been in a better position to give my parents even an inch of what they have always given me.I am in total despair right now as to what I can do to make things better.I just keep praying there is no bigger turmoil than this that we have to face.I hope all of us will come out of this in one piece, safe and secure.
Although, for sure, the souls will be scarred.And the hearts will bleed.
Saw MNIK today and I think it’s a touching subject they have worked on, and worked on well. Shahrukh Khan copied Sean Penn quite well,actually.Probably his only movie which offers some variation from his typical,same acting.
The day was among the most wierder I have had here.No prayers for today.Feel like going out,meeting some friends.Let’s see if that works out.
The weather has been fantastic since last night.I wanted to sleep under the sky but did’nt.Can you believe I started my blog talking about weather.But anyway, yesterday was kind of eventful, had a breakfast party and spent the whole day lazily.
Today is good.Holding on to hope for things to get better all around.Atleast, I selfishly think, for people around me. I am very uch looking forward to Toy Story 3. Plan to make creme chicken today, although all I want to have is jugs full of chilled milkshakes.And what’s this craze about cupcakes on blogs lately.Not that it’s not immensely enjoyable.
Oh,yeah.One more thing I need to start doing is write letters.And loads of them.
Fingers crossed for everything.I mean,everything.
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golden blues 